I've been thinking a lot about what is important to me and what do I live for? Do I live to make a name for myself? Do I live to impress people? So I live for the fame? Do I live for my family? Do I live just to get by?
Who or what do you live for?
The first thing always in my life is living and pleasing the living God who loves me in spite of all my flaws. He loves me in the midst of doubt, fear, He always has great plans for me, He loves me unconditionally. He challenges me to be better, do better, and be change. He has been the one helping me shine through the divorces taking place in my family, through dysfunction in relationships in family, friends, and dating. He never gives up on me. He makes me a light and has made me and is still making me into a strong woman of God that I never imagined myself being :)
The second thing I live for is to bring the light to my family. My family is someone God placed in my life to love unconditionally. They are with you always.
My family consists of many parts. First of all my mom and dad always. Then my second mom (stepmom). Then comes my four younger sisters, Amanda, Jennifer, Katherine, and Joanne. These people are my immediate family and they bless me. Most of all, my little sisters are a huge blessing to me, and I want the best for them. Being the oldest I want to share with them an example they can follow after, everyone makes mistakes, but in my family there has been a lot of dysfunction so I am trying to set a new standard and show my sisters they can do something different and see the light of God. In fact my sister Amanda, my grandmother, and my mom are some of the first hardcore Christians, my grams is a prayer warrior, my mom is a woman of mercy, my sister, a burst of sweet peace :)
My sis, me, my mom, my grams :)
My stepmom/second mom, Amanda, my dad, me, my sister Joanne, Jennifer, Katherine :)
My family :)
They all care for me, and I for them. God placed those people into your life, to shine for. Not only those people but I have my mom and dad's side, plus my second mom's side, my stepfamily! What's awesome is they are from Mexico. So through them I've gotten to experience things that bless me so much in life :)
I'm so close to them, they are some of the best family ever. They are joyful, we have went through hard times together and they have just been a source of family I have never had. I'm blessed.
Next my friends! There are those ones like my friends from church that I have been at for 17 years or so. We have been through thick and thin. My friends Sara and Becky have been there for years, and I'm so blessed by our friendships. Life has seasons and friends change with that, but it is cool to see friends keep through many seasons :)
Sara, Becky, and I :)
Next there are new friends Kyrri and Becca who were in a worship event with me this last summer. Since I have been at school I have kept in contact and close with them, and of course, my college friends. I got burned by a close group of friends in high school. Made me lose all hope in friendships in general, so I was afraid to get close again. You know when friendships crash and burn it causes you to almost hide and not try again.
Sara, Kyrri, me, and Becca :)
But I was blessed by 4 years with great girls, specifically, Becca, Kimmy, and Sarah. They have been some of the closest friends I have had in forever, and it is scary at points they see things in me that I can't even see. It is great all at once though. Other friends such as Ashley, Jon, Kalvin, Evan, Tony, Peter, Katrina, Diala, Erica, Jasmin, there are so many I have made in college and I'm so blessed by everyone! Let me tell you, if you are afraid, don't be any longer, jump out, let yourself build a community among people. Don't be afraid, in the end, people will always make mistakes, this is one of your challenges to truly love people. Step out in faith, enjoy it, learn from it, keep on it :D
Kimmy, Becca, Sarah, and I :)
Tony, Jon, Ashley, Sarah, Benino, Becca, me, and Kalvin :D
Sarah, Kimmy, me, Jamie, Jasmin, and Becca :)
Sarah, Jasmin, Erica, and me :)
Me and DJ, my cool friend who loves some of the same things I do :)
Wendy & DJ some of my sweet friends who I love to get together with :) They love the office, they love coffee, and they are hilarious :)
This is my amazing friend Katrina, who rocks and blesses my life :) She rocks :D
Cassy Taber is a sweet friend who brings so much joy to my life :)
She amazes me and we always keep in contact even though we may not be in the same place, I love our friendship :D
Elizabeth is my amazing high school friend who I have managed to keep in contact with, and also she came to visit me once :) It was fun! :D
Sam Eide, my freshman year roomate, and just a blessing in my life, she rocks, and blesses my heart. She may be tough, but she is a sweetheart :)
One of my bffs is Ashli :) She blesses my life with craziness, joy and she's a sweetheart, friends since before college, now she's getting married, and we just tend to have the funnest of times together :D
Then there is those friendships that stay forever. Lydia Valencia and I have been friends since we were little, she is sweet, lovely, and one of my best friends, she is great, and I love her dearly :)
Chawkeen is another dear friend of mine!
And of course Patrick Hendon, life would not be the same without you :)
Not to mention my mentor Karen Innis, the one who introduced me to coffee years ago! She has blessed my life and brings me joy! We sometimes go to another planet, specifically FRAPPE PLANET (AKA FRAPPUCHINO PLANET CARAMEL)! She has spurred me on with my walk with God and blesses me, encourages me with sweet cards, she loves music, we have been through so much life together, I love her to pieces. She is my blessing from Jesus, one of my best friends!
There are also my sweet small group girls who have developed into friendships, Andrea Swords specifically blesses my life, through her sarcasm, Black Fridays, funny talks, random moments, pictures, CRAZY EPISODES, she rocks. She is a sweet girl who loves Jesus and coloring. She is so great :D
So many blessings come from these relationships, look at what I would have missed hiding away! I'm encouraging you even if you have been hurt, step out, dive into relationships, sure some may not work out or hit a dry season, but in the end, you will learn a lot, be blessed and find lifetime relationships with friends, family, and such that will bless your heart so much :)
The call. The call is the most important thing in life. Whatever God shows me to do, I want to do, I don't want anything less, I couldn't imagine anything more worth pursuing or being a part of. Mhmm. God has blessed me. I fully surrendered my entire life starting Christmas season of my senior year of high school. Getting crushed by friendships crashing and burning all around me, I ran to God, applied to two schools. Little did I know as I prayed and filled out my North Central University application that would change the rest of my life. I decided that day, praying, I was dedicating the rest of my life to helping people through my major in social work. Crazy how in a few hours of worship music, pop, praying, and overview of my life with God that I was locking in something that would turn my life inside out. Well I can tell you now, on the hindsight to graduation in a week and another semester, God's call is amazing. You will make mistakes, but hold on to that bible, and that relationship with God and you will go places you will have never imagined :)
As of now I want to help people through social work, being a light in the world! After that on the side, possibly is pursue music a little bit more, singing, doing outreaches by singing. I love singing, and I developed my voice while here, and in the past. More than ever I feel God using me through singing and it has been amazing :D
God makes things beautiful in His time. I'm blessed to know He is in control and loves me so much :)
Jesus blesses my soul, and makes me whole again, and I will never be the same. I live for His love, to shine, show, and be blessed and bless wherever I am. I want to know people, everyone, God loves everyone, He loves the poor, the rich, the broken, the put together, the thief, the missing, and I want to go out and take action in loving others and helping them when they are ready. I live for this.
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